I'm Not Dead Yet
by Delectable Sweetness
Summary: How was she the one who was unlucky? Sophie Gerard, the French anthropologist, certainly didn't have a good aim. She had missed her intended target - her husband, and shot her. It was unfair. Why should she be the one to die? She wasn't ready to leave.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Law and Order SVU or any of its characters. They belong to Dick Wolf. No copy infringement intended. However, I do own my own writing, my own characters and the plot to this story, Delectable Sweetness©.**

**Author's Note: So this is just a short story. Maybe between three – five chapters. It's also AU.**

Chapter 1

How was she the one who was unlucky? That was the question Melinda Warner had been asking herself as she lay on something soft. It was something that she figured didn't quite come with the job description as a Medical Examiner. Sure, being in the line of fire, came with being in a war. She had been in her fair share of life threatening moments as she served her time in the Air Force during the Gulf War. It wasn't unheard of for a doctor to get shot while at their post, but the only thing was… she wasn't in war now. She wasn't in some foreign country fighting. No, she had been in her morgue where she worked, trying to help bring justice to victims.

And, so, she asked the same question again. How was she the one who was unlucky? Sophie Gerard, the French anthropologist, certainly didn't have a good aim. She had missed her intended target - her husband, and shot her. It was unfair. Why should she be the one to die? She wasn't ready to leave yet. This wasn't how she was supposed to go. She still had so much left to do… to say. She had never realised how terrified of death she was… until now.

No, it wasn't fair.

Coming back to reality, she didn't pay attention to the noise of the sirens or the bumpiness of the ride or the voices telling her that she was going to be okay. Instead she stared up towards the person who was holding her hand tightly in his. It seemed so warm compared to hers. It felt like she was holding hands with the sun. She was confused. Was she that cold or was he just that hot? It felt good to have his warm hand wrapped around hers, though. She only wished she could squeeze his hand back, but she hadn't got the energy. Her entire body felt weak, almost numb. She felt cold… really cold. That couldn't be good. In fact, she knew it wasn't good. She felt her heart rate quicken as panic began to settle its way into her limp form.

Feeling a tear roll down the side of her face, she locked eyes with him. He had the most beautiful hazel eyes she had ever seen. They were hypnotising and she could get lost in them. She gave him a small smile and tried not to pay attention to her racing heart as he gave her hand a reassuring squeeze, softly murmuring, "Everything's goin' to be okay… I promise." He gave her a small smile. She noticed a tear roll down his cheek.

She gasped slightly, oxygen from the plastic oxygen mask she was wearing racing down her throat. Her secret crush, her best friend… was crying over her. She tried to speak, but she couldn't. Her voice seemed strangled, practically inaudible.

All of a sudden all she could feel was an intense and agonising, searing pain. It felt as if a red hot knife had been thrust into her stomach and was being twisted around. The tiny monitor that she was hooked up to in the ambulance started going wild. She knew this was it. This was the end.

Her back arched slightly as pain ripped through her and somehow she managed to grip Fin's hand and hold onto it tightly. Her lungs burned, like she was inhaling a hot flame as she struggled to breathe. Everything started to go out of focus. Her eyes were starting to blur and darkness was beginning to pull her under. She strained to keep her eyes open.

She heard a distant voice calling her, but she could not answer. She was being continuously sucked into darkness and it frightened her. She didn't want to go. She wanted to stay with Fin. All of a sudden, she felt something wet hitting her face. It felt like rain, but that was crazy because she wasn't outside… or was she? At this point she couldn't tell whether she was still in the ambulance or whether she was being rushed into the hospital. Everything was just becoming a blur. When one landed on her lip, though, she could taste the saltiness in the water. Then she knew it was Fin's tears.

As her brown eyes slid shut of their own accord, she felt something soft and warm lightly brush across the side of her cheek, then a beautiful voice softly whispering, "Come back to me, please." The warm, softness brushed across her cheek again before she was completely engulfed in the darkness.

XXX

All around him there were noises. A baby crying, people talking, a phone ringing, yet he didn't pay attention to any of them. Instead he was lost in his own thoughts. He wondered how this could have happened. He only wished that he had have been in there with her. Maybe he could have saved her. Maybe she wouldn't have even gotten shot at all. He just wished that he had been the one to go down to the morgue with the suspect instead of Olivia or Jo Marlowe.

All different possibilities swarmed his head as he waited impatiently for the doctor to come out with some news. Nobody had come to see him since they had taken Melinda into surgery. That had been three hours ago. He wondered was it better that they were in there longer. Surely if she had went in and then the doctor came out thirty minutes later, it was bad news, but maybe if they were in there longer, then they were doing all that they could and it could be good news. He didn't really know. All he did know, was that he was getting a headache just thinking about such things. All he wanted was to see her.

When he had heard there had been a hostage situation down in the morgue, he had immediately gone with Elliot and the both of them had driven down there at lightning speed. Of course when they had gotten there, the doors had been locked and they hadn't been able to get in. They had been informed that Sophie Gerard, their initial suspect, was holding everyone hostage with a gun she had managed to grab off of a police officer.

He had immediately started panicking, and when he had heard the gunshot, he felt his worst fears beginning to come to life. He had constantly wondered who had gotten shot. He had just prayed that it wasn't Melinda, but when the door had opened and a gurney was being pushed out with a familiar person lying on it, his worst fear had come to life.

At first, Melinda had been alert and awake and very talkative, but as they were in the ambulance on their way to Mercy General Hospital, something strange had happened and she had taken a turn for the worst. She had lost consciousness. He had been told that it was because she had lost so much blood, but deep down, he had a bad feeling that it was something more.

So, as he sat here on one of the uncomfortable seats, he found himself praying, something that he had never really done before, but he was giving it a shot. _Look… I know I don't do this often enough or… ever, but please… I'm begging you to do me this one favour. Please… don't take her away from me… please. She has so much left to do, to give. I have so much left I need to say to her._ _Please, just let her live._ He silently pleaded, trying to hold back his tears.

He just wished that somebody would come out to talk to them already. He was getting frustrated just sitting here, feeling helpless. He hated the feeling of helplessness.

Sighing, he buried his face in his hands.

God, this couldn't be happening!

**Author's Note: So what did you think? Was it any good?**

**Next chapter should be up soon. *_***

**Review please. *_* xxx**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Fin jumped up out of his seat when he seen a doctor walking towards their small group. As the doctor stopped in front of him, he pulled off his scrub cap and ran a hand over his tired looking face. Fin felt his heart drop into his stomach. The doctor looked less than optimistic.

Gulping, he locked eyes with the doctor… hazel staring into blue. Licking his dry, cracked lips, he let out a shaky breath before speaking. "So… how is… she?" He asked slowly, stammering a little.

"I'm afraid we did all we could, but-"

Fin cut him off. "No… no… don't say it," he shook his head furiously, not wanting to hear what was about to come out of the doctor's mouth. Melinda couldn't be dead.

He tensed when he felt the doctor place his hand against his shoulder. "Mr…" the doctor trailed off, waiting for his name.

"Tutuola… Fin Tutuola," he gritted his teeth, trying to hold back his emotions.

"Mr. Tutuola… it's not what you think," he said somewhat reassuringly.

"Then what is it?" Olivia exclaimed, and Fin was grateful that she spoke up. He didn't think he had it in him anymore. He was so confused.

"Well, Ms. Warner sustained a very serious injury, and with the amount of blood that she had lost… her body wasn't able to sustain itself… I'm afraid to tell you this, but… Melinda fell into a coma…" he said regretfully.

Fin felt his heart clench in his chest. His whole body felt numb. His legs felt like jelly and everything around him began to spin. This couldn't be happening. Melinda couldn't be in a… coma. "You're wrong!" He exclaimed, his voice beginning to rise. "She… she can't be in a… coma!" He yelled, glaring at the man standing in front of him.

"Mr. Tutuola… I'm sorry, but-"

Fin cut him off again. "Don't give me that crap! You're a doctor for God's sake… Can't you do something?" He growled out, his anger too far gone for him to even see a little bit of reason.

"Fin, you need to calm down," Olivia said softly, gripping his shoulder.

Turning, he glared at his friend. "This is all your fault! You should have been paying better attention!" He declared loudly, frustration and anger showing through each word he spoke. "How could you let that nut job get a gun?"

"Fin I-"

"How could you have been so careless?" He asked, tears beginning to come to his eyes.

"Fin!" Elliot exclaimed. "You need to relax. If you want to blame someone… then blame the person who shot her, not Olivia. She didn't pull the gun on, Melinda… and she certainly didn't pull the trigger." He said.

"I… I… I'm… sorry," he stuttered. A tear rolled down his cheek, and he swiped at it, trying to wipe the shameful evidence away. He couldn't cry in front of his colleagues, his friends. No matter how long he had known them, he still wasn't one to show his emotions. "I'm sorry," he said once again, the anger at his friend beginning to fade. He knew he was in the wrong. Olivia didn't deserve his anger or hatred.

Elliot was right. He should be blaming the woman who had shot Melinda, and who had caused all of this hardship and drama.

"Fin… its fine," she said softly as she pulled him into a hug.

"I don't… I just…" he fumbled over his words.

"I know, Fin… I know," she whispered as she let go of him.

Fin gave her a small smile before running his hands over his face, trying to wipe away his tears. Sniffling a little, he turned his attention back to the doctor. "Sorry," he mumbled, apologising for his embarrassing outburst.

The doctor gave him a small smile. "Don't worry about it."

He nodded slightly. "S-so will… she m-make… it?" He asked shakily.

"Well, the next twenty-four to forty-eight hours are critical, and the fact that she's not breathing on her own is a little worrying, but if she starts to improve there is a chance she will make it. She's in the ICU now if you want to go and see her," he spoke softly.

"Yes please," he whispered. He looked to everyone else, who gave him sad smiles.

"You go on in first, Fin," Munch said softly.

Nodding, he followed the doctor down the seemingly endless hall as they walked towards Melinda's room. When they reached it, the doctor gave him a small smile before he left him alone.

As he walked into the room, he gasped. Tears began streaming down his face. He found that he could no longer hold them in and he didn't want to. The sight before him broke his heart. Melinda was hooked up to all kinds of machines, an EEG monitor, a heart machine, a blood pressure machine and a pulse oximeter which was hooked to her index finger and then hooked up to the heart monitor. There was also an IV in her left arm and a breathing tube that was supplying oxygen to her.

He smiled slightly at the fact that he knew all the names to the machines. Melinda had taught them to him one day… against his will of course, but he had still listened nonetheless. He was glad he had because now he had some understanding of what was hooked up to her fragile body.

Biting his lip, he walked over to her and sat down in one of the chairs beside her hospital bed, and gripped her hand in his. "I'm here, Mel," he whispered, kissing the back of her hand gently. "I'm not going anywhere… I promise," he sniffled, holding onto her hand tighter. He pressed another kiss to the back of her hand, holding it just under his chin.

XXX

_Three days later._

"So, I brought your favourite blanket… you know the purple one? I also brought you some roses because I know they're your favourite," he said as he gently placed the purple throw over her. Gently, he lifted up her hands and placed them on top of the covers.

He picked up the fresh, red roses and put them in the vase he had brought. Walking over to the sink, he filled it up with water before moving back over to her. He left the beautiful flowers down on the press beside Melinda's hospital bed.

Before he sat down, he pressed a warm kiss to her forehead, breathing in her intoxicating scent before sitting down. The hint of roses against her skin didn't go unnoticed by him. The nurses must have come in and washed her before he had gotten here. He had asked them to use her favourite soap when they were washing her. It had been a strange request, but he was happy that they obliged him and used it. He wanted Melinda to feel as much at home as someone in a coma possibly could while in a hospital.

When he sat down, he gripped her hand and held it against his cheek, the coldness of it feeling like he was holding a pack of ice against his warm skin. He sighed as he began talking to her. "How are you feeling today? You're looking a little better," he said as he ran his free hand along the top of her head. "May… maybe you can wake up today… you know… if you want to," he spoke with such hope in his voice.

He brushed her hair back off of her face some more, just wishing she would respond. He knew she wouldn't, but that still didn't stop the longing. He believed that she could hear him and so, he would never stop talking to her. He talked to her all day every day. He wanted her to know what was going on in the outside world, whether she was awake or not. "So, Cragen gave me a couple of weeks off from work… which is probably a good thing… because you know I wouldn't be able to concentrate on work… You're on my mind too much, which is a good thing by the way," he said reassuringly, smiling a little.

He looked over his shoulder when he heard the room doors slide open. He watched as Munch walked into the room with some colourful flowers in his hands. Fin gave his partner a small smile when he placed the flowers down beside the roses. "How are you doing, man?" He asked as he took a seat in the chair beside him.

Fin sighed. "Fine… I guess," he mumbled as he shrugged his shoulders. He wasn't really in the mood for conversation. In fact, he wasn't really in the mood to talk to anyone. All he wanted to do was be alone with Melinda. Of course, he couldn't stop them from coming to visit her, but that didn't mean that he had to talk to them. They had been asking the same endless questions over the last three days and it had quickly become infuriating and annoying.

"Any change?" Munch asked curiously. Fin shook his head no. He held onto Melinda's hand tighter. "Do you want some coffee or something?" He asked another question.

"No," Fin muttered. "I just want to be left alone." He closed his eyes, trying to contain his anger.

After all, what right did he have to be angry at everyone? They had just as much right to be here as him. It wasn't as if he owned her. He wasn't married to her. They weren't engaged. Hell, they weren't even dating. No, they were just friends - best-friends! He may have been the closet one to her out of their group, but she still had other friends – friends that didn't consist of just him.

He looked over his shoulder again when he heard the doors to the room slide open once again. His heart skipped a beat when Doctor Simmons walked in holding a chart in his hands. Fin hoped that he would have at least a small bit of good news for him, anything that would make this horrible situation a little brighter.

The doctor gave him a small smile before going about his business, checking her vitals, blood pressure and whatever else he needed to. He was so focused on what the doctor was doing that he barely noticed Munch getting up and leaving the room. Guilt immediately filled him from being so cold to his partner. Munch was like a brother to him and he hated himself for treating him like crap, like he was the last person he wanted to see.

"So, any change?" He asked curiously.

Doctor Simmons looked at him, his blank expression revealing nothing. He sighed before he wrote something else down on her chart and then walked around her bed towards him. "I'm afraid not. Her body is healing and things are looking a little better, but her body hasn't shown any sign that she's going to be waking up any time soon," he said regretfully. "I'm sorry," he murmured softly before leaving the room.

"Okay," he whispered, too late for the doctor to even hear him.

Fin felt his eyes begin to tear up once again as he tried to fight off the feeling of hopelessness. He would not think that way. He had to believe that Melinda would wake up.

Melinda wasn't a quitter, she was a fighter and he just hoped that this would be one of those times where her stubborn will to live made her wake up.

XXX

Olivia swiped at her cheeks as she stared at her reflection in the fogged up mirror. Sniffling, she tried to get a control on her emotions, not wanting to be an emotional wreck before heading out to work. The last couple of days had been hard on everyone, but most of all Fin.

It was still so hard for her to believe that one of her closest friends was actually in the hospital fighting for her life - that she was in a coma. The fact that Melinda could die at any moment had all of them reeling in fear. It had hit Fin hard, and she didn't think she could ever understand what he was going through.

The loss of her own mother had been different than what she was experiencing now. She had loved her mother, but they had become distant over the years before her death. The fact that she had died from an alcohol induced accident was something that had made her death a little easier on Olivia. She knew how bad that sounded, but maybe it was the fact that it had helped her deal with her loss. Her mother had been abusing alcohol ever since she had been able to remember, so she supposed that she had prepared herself for the fallout from that, that could one day happen, and it had.

Her mother had drunkenly fell down the stairs to the subway and died.

But Melinda was different. She didn't abuse alcohol or drugs. She wasn't a bad person. She was a good woman who opened her heart to everyone.

She didn't deserve this.

It wasn't fair!

Letting out a shaky breath, she wiped the condensation off of the mirror and began fixing herself up. She dried her eyes before she applied a little bit of make-up to her face. She fixed her hair, and then wondered out of her little bathroom and into her bedroom.

She got dressed before picking up her standard issued weapon and badge, hooking them onto her work pants. Sighing, she walked out of her room and into the living room. Picking up her jacket, she walked out of her apartment, slamming the door closed behind her.

Looking at her watch, she checked the time, realising that she didn't have to be in work for another two hours. Taking the opportunity, she decided that she would go pay Melinda a visit and she how she was doing.

XXX

She slowly walked through the double doors, biting her lip as she stepped into the dimly lit room. She saw Fin sitting down in one of the uncomfortable chairs, holding onto Melinda's hand. She heard him talking to her, but she tried to ignore his one-sided conversation, not wanting to appear nosey.

It broke her heart to see him looking so distraught. She had never seen him so emotional before. Usually because he was always so closed off and guarded about his emotions. They all saw him as a badass, even though, she was pretty sure there was another side to him.

Walking over to the spare seat, she sat down and looked at Fin before turning her gaze to the limp form lying in the hospital bed. She had never seen Melinda looking so fragile, and she didn't think that she wanted to ever again. She was so used to Melinda being so stubborn and hard-head, not weak and frail.

"So, how is she doing?" She asked curiously.

Fin sighed. "The same… There hasn't been any change." He turned his head to look at her. "So, you decided to finally come down…" he trailed off.

Olivia averted her gaze from his and began fiddling with her fingers. She hadn't been to see Melinda since they had gotten the news about her falling into a coma. She had been trying to avoid the hospital as long as she could, not wanting to deal with all of the ensuing emotions, but it hadn't worked. Even at home she was a hysterical mess. It had been inevitable for her to finally come down to the hospital to see her friend.

"I-I'm sorry… I just… I couldn't deal with all of this…" she sighed, gesturing her hand towards Melinda's weak form.

"I understand," he said simply, returning his gaze back to Melinda.

Olivia sighed. "How have you been doing?" She asked curiously.

"Fine," he muttered.

"Come on, Fin… I know you're not 'fine.'" She air quoted the word 'fine.' "Talk to me," she pleaded.

"What do you want me to say?" He mumbled.

"Well, how come you never told, Melinda how you felt about her?" She asked curiously, trying to get a little more than a few words out of him.

"I don't know what you're talking about," he didn't look at her.

"Bullshit!" She exclaimed. "Everyone knows you love her, Fin!"

He looked at her, is jaw set and his eyes a hardened gaze. "We're just friends, Olivia!" He exclaimed.

"Who are you trying to convince? Me or you?" She asked.

"I don't have to convince anyone… because it's not true!" He exclaimed once again, looking away from her.

Rolling her eyes, she stood up. Maybe she had pushed him too far by asking such a personal question. On the upside, she had gotten him to say more than a few words. "Well, I guess I'll be off then," she mumbled as she began walking out of the room.

"Bye," Fin muttered after her.

_Stubborn son-of-a-bitch!_ She thought.

**Author's Note: So what did you think? Was it any good?**

**Next chapter should be up soon. *_***

**Review please. *_* xxx**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"So, have you been down to the hospital, yet?" Munch asked Olivia as she sat down at her desk.

Olivia looked at him and gave him a sad smile, one that was probably not so optimistic looking either. "Yeah…" she sat down and scooted her chair in closer to her desk. She ran her slender fingers through her shoulder length, brown hair numbly before picking up a file that was resting in a pile of others on her desk.

"How was she?" He asked curiously, looking at her over the top of his glasses.

Olivia looked at him. She already knew that he knew the answer to his own question. Mainly because he had been down at Mercy General not so long ago, too, but that still didn't dull the need to ask about their friend. "The same," she mumbled. "Nothing's changed…" sadness filled her voice.

Sighing slightly, she began aimlessly flicking through the file, trying anything that would take her mind off of the troubles that were filling the atmosphere around them. Sadly, nothing seemed to be able to keep her mind off of the troubles at hand.

"And Fin?" Munch asked.

"Being stubborn as usual, won't leave her side or nothing!" She stated a little sharply.

"And that's a bad thing?" He raised a bushy eyebrow.

Sighing, she threw down the file she had been aimlessly flicking through and looked at Fin's partner. "Well… no, but… It's just… everything seems so screwed up! Fin's become distant, and I know that's to be expected, but… I just…" she sighed. "I guess I'm worried that, Melinda won't wake up, and… that scares me." She bit her lip. "I mean… come on… We both know exactly how, Fin feels for, Melinda… and just the thought that he might never get the chance to tell her is… heart-breaking!" She frowned as she tried to hold back some of her tears. Melinda was her best-friend, and Fin was like a brother to her. The thought of them not being able to tell each other how they felt, was truly heart-breaking.

Olivia knew how much Melinda loved Fin, but they were just as stubborn as each other, if not more, and so it had become a never ending circle of denying feelings. She just hoped that they got the chance to admit their feelings.

She sighed slightly. Sometimes she wished that she had someone to care for her as much as Fin cared for Melinda. Every time Fin and Melinda looked at each other, there was nothing but true love in their eyes, and they could deny it all they wanted, but she could see it and so could everyone else. She wished she had that.

"I know what you mean, Liv, but… let's face it… Melinda may never wake up. I think… we're just going to have to try and help, Fin… deal with it… no matter how hard he tries to ignore that fact." Munch said, bringing her out of her thoughts.

"Do you think that… we should start to prepare him for the possibility… that, Melinda," she choked up slightly, "may die?" Her voice became nothing but a mere whisper.

Munch looked at her with sad eyes, the both of them feeling nothing but sympathy for their closest friends. "I think he already knows the chances, but he just chooses not to believe it," he shrugged his shoulders slightly.

Olivia nodded, "I think I would be the same," she mused sadly.

XXX

Fin watched the gentle rise and fall of Melinda's chest, the constant beat of her heart in perfect sync with the machine. The beeping seemed to soothe him, as if it was the only way for him to know that she was still alive.

He sighed as he pressed his thousandth kiss to the back of her limp hand. His feelings for her over the last couple of years had developed beyond just mere friendship. The truth was he loved her with all his heart. He had lied to Olivia. Of course he had. Why? Because he couldn't face the truth of his feelings. He had denied them for so long that he almost had himself convinced, but Olivia was right. He wasn't fooling anyone, including himself. He could deny it all he wanted, but everyone knew the truth… he knew the truth.

He was in love with Melinda Warner.

He silently mused to himself, wondering if Melinda had ever figured out his feelings towards her. He wasn't sure. She had never said anything to him about it. In fact, she had never even shown a little bit of a hint that she had known. He unconsciously shrugged his shoulders. Maybe she hadn't.

He sighed. Did it really matter now?

Coming out of his thoughts, Fin gently ran his index finger along her cheek. Why couldn't he have told her that he loved her before all of this had happened? He knew why. Dear God, did he know why. He had been a coward! The big, bad Odafin Tutuola hadn't been able to get up the courage to tell a woman how he felt about her.

But this wasn't just any woman. This was Melinda Warner. She was the definition of perfect. To him she was a goddess. A damn fine one! And he vowed that as soon as she woke up, he was going to tell her how he felt about her. He couldn't deny his feelings any longer. It would be easier to deny his next breath.

He jumped slightly when he heard a familiar ringing noise. It was his phone. Sighing, he shoved his hand into his pocket and pulled out his phone. He rolled his eyes when he seen the name up on the screen. Standing up, he leaned down and pressed a kiss to Melinda's forehead, mumbling, "I'll be back in a moment," before walking out of the room.

When he walked through the sliding doors, he pressed the answer button and held the phone up to his ear. "Hello?"

"_Fin? It's Laura,"_ the voice on the other end said.

Fin sighed slightly, not really in the mood for this. "Hi, Laura," he said simply.

There was a pause for a moment. _"So, I was wondering if you wanted get together tonight." _She asked hopeful.

Rolling his eyes, he had to try and hold back a growl. He was angry that she was even calling him, yet it wasn't even her fault. She didn't know the situation at hand and he had given her no reason not to call him. In fact, he had told her to call him sometime. "I can't… I'm busy…" he trailed off.

"_Oh… Well, how about tomorrow night then?"_ She asked.

He ran his hand down along his face, trying to wipe some of his tiredness away. He hadn't had a decent night's sleep since this had all happened. For the first two nights he had had to go home because of the visiting hour's restriction, but now they were just letting him stay. As long as he didn't cause trouble the doctor said it was okay. He was grateful for that.

He hated to be away from Melinda. If he wasn't here when she woke up or God, forbid something happened, he would never be able to forgive himself. He was finding it hard to be away from her now, and he was only just standing outside of her hospital room.

Sighing, he came out of his thoughts. "Look Laura, I'm sorry… but this just isn't gonna work," he told her truthfully.

"_It's because of her, isn't it?"_ She asked. She had known about his crush on Melinda - Probably because he had never stopped talking about the curly-headed M.E.

"… It's complicated…" he bit his lip, hoping she would just leave it alone. He didn't want to fight. Things between him and her weren't even that serious. He had only ever asked her out on one date, and he had to leave halfway through it because of a case. To be honest, he was actually a little surprised that she had called him; not that he had been waiting on her to call or anything, but still. It was a surprise.

He heard her sigh. _"That's Fine,"_ she mumbled before hanging up.

Pressing the hang-up button, he shoved his phone back into his pocket, wondering why he had ever even asked Laura out on a date. He didn't feel anything for her, not even the slightest bit of an attraction.

When he had gone on a date with her, he had felt like he had been dragged into the restaurant and had been forced to sit with a complete stranger.

He had known Laura for a couple of months, but Melinda was worth more to him than her.

Shaking his head slightly, he walked back into the ICU room and tiredly walked back over to Melinda's bedside. Leaning down, he pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead, murmuring, "sorry about that."

Sitting down in what had now become his chair, he picked up her hand and encased in the both of his. He rested his elbows against the bed and rested his head against their entwined hands. "So, when you wake up," he said optimistically, "I have something very important that I need to tell you." He cleared his throat. "And… I hope that you'll feel the same way," he said, a hint of shyness attacking his voice.

He frowned for a moment. "I-I guess I could… tell you now," he mumbled. He raised his eyes and looked at her pale face. Letting out a shaky breath, he moved one of his hands towards her head and began stroking her hair in a calming manner. "I love you, Melinda," he said softly. "I love you so much… that it hurts," he tried to hold back his tears. Raw emotion filled his voice. "I need for you to… come back to… me, so I can tell you that… properly," he sniffled. "I promise I'm going to take care of you for the rest of my life, Melinda. You mean… the world… to me, and… I'm just sorry I didn't tell you sooner." He pressed a kiss to her hand.

Laying his head down on her bed, he held her hand under his chin and closed his eyes, trying to let his body finally succumb to his exhaustion.

XXX

_Four days later._

"I'm not leaving her!" Fin growled out, his hazel eyes shooting daggers towards Olivia.

Olivia rolled her eyes. "Stop being an ass, Fin!" She stated sharply. "When was the last time you went home?" She questioned, raising an eyebrow.

Fin smirked slightly, knowing this was the sole reason that she was trying to get him to leave Melinda's bedside, something that he didn't intend to do. "Early this morning!" He exclaimed slightly. "I went home, got a shower and changed my clothes, got something to eat… then came back here," he clarified, making sure that she understood that no matter what she said to him, he wasn't leaving his love's side.

"And that whole routine took what? Half an hour?" She questioned, crossing her arms. "Fin, you need to take a break. I can stay here with, Melinda while you go get something to eat," she said in a softer tone.

"No, and you can't make me!" He knew he sounded like a petulant child, but at that moment in time he really didn't care.

"Will you two stop fighting!" Elliot exclaimed, glaring at the two of them.

Fin averted his eyes from Elliot's, feeling slightly ashamed that he had even raised his voice in Melinda's presence. It was disrespectful and childish. He sighed slightly. "Sorry," he muttered.

"Now, Liv… if Fin, doesn't want to leave then you can't make him," Elliot explained. "And Fin, you need to stop taking your anger out on everyone else," He scolded.

"Well, I wouldn't have to if people would just leave me al-" He stopped what he was saying when he heard a wild beeping noise.

Everyone's heads shot towards the machines that were hooked up to a now thrashing Melinda. He watched helplessly as her body arched and shook, twisting with what seemed to be pain.

The heart monitor that she was hooked up to began going crazy, the little line going a mile-a-minute. He felt his heart stop. Melinda was choking! Oh God, she was choking! He panicked. Was she going to die? No! No, he couldn't think like that. She wasn't going to die. Melinda was a fighter and so, she would never leave them… him… without a fight.

He turned when he heard the room doors slid open. A bunch of nurses and doctors ran in. He wanted to be near Melinda, but he knew he would only be in their way, so he stepped back.

"What's happening to her?" He shouted, tears began spilling down his face. His heart was breaking as he watched the doctor's work on the love of his life. He loved her so much. It had become easier to tell her that over the last four days. He wasn't sure if it was because she was in a coma or because he had become comfortable telling her, as strange as that was in this situation. She was his other half, his missing piece and he needed her so much. "Please, will somebody just tell me what's wrong?" He cried openly, collapsing against the wall. He could barely hold himself up anymore.

**Author's note: So what did you think? Was it any good? Hmm, so what's wrong with Melinda? Will she make it?**

**Next chapter should be up soon. *_***

**Review please. *_* xxx**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Fin kicked the heel of his foot against the wall as he slid down onto the cold floor. He hadn't got the energy to keep himself upright anymore. He was so tired and scared. He watched as the doctors and nurses rushed around Melinda, trying to help her. Hot, salty tears continued to stream down over his cheeks as he watched Melinda continue to thrash on the bed. He didn't know what was happening.

It had all happened so fast. One minute she was fine and then the next, she was choking. Why was she choking? "What's happening?" He screamed out. He just wished somebody would talk to him.

Sniffling a little, he let out shaky breath when a woman in blue-green scrubs squatted down in front of him. It was one of Melinda's nurses. She had red hair that was pulled back into a ponytail and a set of green eyes. Strangely enough, she reminded him of Casey Novak a little, someone he hadn't seen in almost two years.

The nurse, Chloe, gently gripped his arm and helped him up off of the cold, hard floor. "I'm sorry, Detective Tutuola, but you're going to have to wait outside," she spoke softly.

"No! I wanna stay here… with her!" He tried to move over to her, but the nurse stopped him. He looked at her, anger filling him at the fact that he couldn't go to Melinda, and that no one was telling him anything. "Why won't you tell me what's wrong?" He questioned sharply.

Chloe looked at him with sympathetic eyes, something that angered him more. Sympathy was not what he wanted. He wanted answers! She sighed, but he just continued to stare at her. "Please," she pleaded softly, aiming her hand towards the sliding doors.

His shoulders slumped slightly as he reluctantly turned towards the doors and began walking out. He dragged the back of his hand across his eyes, wiping away his tears as he stood out in the hall. He looked towards Chloe, expecting her to tell him something. "Well…" he crossed his arms, trying to put on an intimating stance and hide the broken man that he now was, but he didn't think that he was fooling anyone.

The nurse looked at him and then spoke in a soft tone. "She's having trouble breathing at the moment… It might have something to do with the breathing tube that's down her throat," she said softly, but directly. "Why don't you go wait with your friends, and a doctor will be out to see you soon. Don't worry… everything's going to be just fine," she smiled softly.

Fin gave her a reluctant nod and began heading down the dim hall, miserably walking back towards the waiting area. He prayed to God, that Melinda was going to be fine. He didn't know what he would do if she didn't pull through this. All he did know, though, was that she was his other half and without her… he was nothing. She completed him.

When he walked into the waiting room, he raised his head and looked at everyone through a tear filled gaze. Elliot and Olivia were sitting down in the seats. They had obviously left when things had started to go wrong. He frowned slightly. Everyone else was here, too. When did that happen?

They all looked at him with hope in their eyes. That hopeful stare was heart-wrenching.

"What happened, Fin?" Olivia asked. "Is she… did she…" she trailed off.

Fin looked at her. "No… no… she's still with us, but she started to choke. The nurse said she was having trouble breathing, and that… it was probably caused by… the tube down her throat." He looked at everyone.

They all looked shocked. Fin knew they were all thinking the same thing. Was this it? Was this the last time they would see their friend? God, he hoped not. He sighed angrily. Why couldn't things just go back to the way they were? When everything was fine and everyone was happy. The only difference, he would finally be able to tell Melinda how much he loved her.

He grimaced.

Life had a funny way of giving you what you wanted and then snatching it away from you. It was cruel! He felt like it made fun of them at their weakest, laughing as they begged and cried for the one they loved to just be okay, but sadly, sometimes begging and praying didn't work.

XXX

Fin was sitting down in one of the uncomfortable chairs beside Olivia, fidgeting with his fingers. Frustration and anger swept through his body as he tried to remain calm and level-headed. So far, it was working, but he didn't know how much longer he could stay like this. He felt like he was about to blow a fuse at any minute.

Two hours had passed since the incident with Melinda and nobody had come out to see him yet. Honestly, he wasn't sure if that was a good thing. It reminded him of when she had first arrived at the hospital after getting shot and how the doctors had taken her straight to surgery. She had been in there for over three hours and when the doctor had come out it hadn't been good news. Now, he was wondering if they had bad news again. God, he hoped not!

Burying his face in his hands, he growled as he stood up. Everyone looked at him, concern on their faces. He didn't pay attention to them. Instead he began pacing back and forth across the hospital floor, trying to channel his rising aggravation into something else. _Fuck this!_ He thought angrily to himself. He couldn't wait around any longer.

If a doctor wasn't going to come to him then he was going to them. "Fin, where are you going?" Olivia called out after him.

He turned around to look at her. "I'm going to see what's taking so long. I can't wait any longer," he stated sharply. He was fed up with waiting.

"Fin, a doctor will be out soon," she tried to reassure.

"That's what the nurse said two hours ago, and where is he? Not here," he answered his own question sarcastically. Turning around, he immediately stopped in his tracks, coming fact to face with Doctor Simmons. His breath caught in his throat and his heart constricted in his chest. The doctor had a blank look on his face. Fin couldn't tell what was about to happen, what he might say. He was unreadable.

Fin gulped slightly, regaining some of his composure. "W-what… happened?" He fumbled with his words a little, but got straight to the point. This was the woman he loved and he was damned if he was going to do small talk first.

"Well," Doctor Simmons started, "the reason she was choking… was because she had started to breathe on her own again, so… she was trying to fight it," he explained.

"And that's a good thing?" He frowned, not caring if he sounded dumb or not.

The doctor gave him a reassuring smile. "Yes, it's a very good thing. In fact, it was her body telling her to wake up."

Fin's eyes went slightly wide. "So…" he couldn't even form another word.

"So," he smiled, "I'm happy to tell you that, Melinda has finally woken up," he said happily.

Fin felt his heart rate begin to increase at the mind-blowingly fantastic news. If he was being honest with himself, he didn't think Melinda would ever wake up. He had tried to stay optimistic, but deep down there had been that nagging feeling at him, the question that constantly loomed over him, over everyone. What if she died?

That was a question he had tried not to dwell on for too long, because he knew that without a doubt, if Melinda had have died… then so would he have. His world would have crumbled and there would have been no-one there to pick up the pieces.

Because he wouldn't have been able to do it!

He shook his head slightly, coming out of his thoughts. "C-can I go… see her?" He whispered, looking down the hall over the doctor's shoulder, anticipation at the thought of seeing her building up inside of him.

"Of course you can," Doctor Simmons said softly.

Not waiting for anything else the doctor might have to say, Fin took off in a run down the hall towards Melinda's room. His heart still pounded in his chest at the prospect of seeing her… awake. Now was his moment to tell her how he truly felt and he wasn't going to let it slip through his fingers. The last week had made him realise just how short life really was. He was going to seize the opportunity that lay in front of him and take it.

Stopping outside of the sliding doors, he just stared in at her. It was such a sight to see. It was so different. She looked different, a little brighter maybe. Her head was tilted to the left slightly, facing away from him. She had been unhooked from a lot of the machines that had been previously connected to her. Now, all that was left as far as he could see was the heart monitor, an IV and a nasal cannula.

He shakily ran his hands over his face before walking into her room. He stopped when she looked at him, a small smile gracing her pale, but still beautiful features. Fin would never be able to describe the feeling that he got when he seen that smile. It was just so perfect.

On shaky legs, he began to slowly walk closer to her bed, never breaking eye contact with her. The rush of emotions that were continuously coursing through his body, were once again becoming somewhat overwhelming, but he would not let her see him break down. He had to keep his brave face.

This moment was just too perfect to do anything else other than hold her close. He just wanted to keep his emotions at bay until he told her how he felt about her. He knew that if he broke down now, he wouldn't be able to form a coherent sentence, let alone tell her that he loved her.

When he came out of his thoughts, he noticed that he had stopped walking and was just standing in the middle of the floor. He looked to Melinda who had a slight crease in her brow – probably in confusion. He watched as her weak body struggled to hold itself up as she tried to push herself into a better sitting position.

He hastily made his way over to her, securely wrapping his arms around her, so she wouldn't fall. He didn't want anything else bad to happen to his precious angel. He held one arm around her, her head resting against his shoulder as he fixed her pillows.

His skin tingled from the touch of her warm breath against it. He felt his heart rate speed up even more, and he knew it was going crazy because he could hear it on the monitor. He frowned. Wait! That wasn't his heartbeat! He turned his head slightly, eyeing the little line moving across the screen in hectic waves.

Sitting down on the edge of the bed, he wrapped his other arm around Melinda, fearful that something bad was happening to her again. "Are you okay, Mel?" He asked softly.

She nodded her head against his shoulder, burying it further into the crook of his neck. God, it felt so good to hold her close. "Perfect," she mumbled.

He just nodded as he rested his cheek against the top of her head. He doubted she was perfect, but he didn't question her on it. He breathed in her intoxicating scent and closed his eyes. She still smelled like roses.

Fin tensed a little when he felt her slide her arm around his waist. He wasn't used to that action from her. Sure she had hugged him, but this felt different. Maybe it was just the fact that she hadn't touched him in anyway in over a week.

Sighing in content and happiness, he pulled back slightly and pressed a warm kiss to her forehead. He held it there for a minute before moving his lips across one of her closed eyes, over her slightly pinker cheeks and then to her lips. He gently pressed his lips against hers, feeling sparks ignite just from a simple action. His heart fluttered when he felt her smile against his mouth.

Pulling back slightly, he broke the kiss. "I love you," he whispered as he rested his cheek against the top of her head once again. He said those three little words with such certainty, knowing that he had never been surer of anything in his entire life.

He shifted slightly when Melinda pulled away from him. He kept his arms wrapped around her, though. His breathing stopped and his heart constricted in his chest for what seemed like the thousandth time over the last week, when she smiled back at him. "I love you, too," she softly said, looking into his eyes. Grinning, he leaned in to give her another kiss, but she turned her head away from him. "Don't Fin," she mumbled.

He frowned. "Why not?"

"I've been in a coma for a week… I've got bad breath," she mumbled, and Fin could see a hint of pink cover her cheeks. He didn't think he had ever been as happy to see a woman blush.

He chuckled. "I don't care," gently gripping her chin; he turned her head, so she was looking at him. Leaning in, he pressed his lips against hers.

"I thought you said you didn't love her?" A voice he had been hoping not to hear brought him out of his thoughts.

Reluctantly breaking their kiss, he turned to look at Olivia. He gave her a dazed grin, turning his attention back to his beloved. "I lied," was all he said as he gently traced his thumb across her bottom lip. Melinda gave him a smile.

"Ha-ha… I knew it!" Olivia exclaimed, clapping her hands together as she walked over to the two of them, Elliot, Munch and Captain Cragen following close behind her. "So, are you going to move, so I can give my best-friend a hug?" She asked, stopping in front of them.

Fin pursed his lips slightly. "Hmm, I don't know," he mumbled, not wanting to let go of Melinda just yet.

"Fin!" She exclaimed, putting her hands on her hips.

He sighed, knowing he would never hear the end of it if he didn't move. "Fine," he muttered, reluctantly unhooking his arms from around Melinda. "Just be gentle with her," he warned, as he got up to move away from the bed. He stopped when he felt a slight tug on his shirt. Turning, he looked at Melinda who had her big brown eyes widened, pleading for him not to leave her.

Giving her a small, reassuring smile, he sat back down on the edge of the bed, but out of Olivia's way. Melinda gave him a smile before turning her attention to Olivia and the rest of the group. He gently placed his hand on Melinda's leg, silently wondering if they had noticed his and Melinda's silent exchange and just chose to ignore it. He didn't really care if they had or not.

He was just happy that he was here with Melinda and that she was awake.

Giving her leg a gentle squeeze, he began rubbing his hand soothingly along it, trying to reassure her that he was here and that he wasn't going anywhere. She still had a pretty tight grip on his shirt, one that she didn't seem to be loosening anytime soon.

He didn't mind, though. He was just happy that he got to tell her how he felt about her and that she returned his feelings, too.

XXX

Melinda let out a sigh of content when she snuggled further into Fin's side. He was lying on her bed with his ankles crossed and his arm wrapped securely around her. She rested her head against his shoulder, her fingers tangled as tightly into his shirt as she could muster. Her strength was severely depleted and the doctor had told her that it would take some time before she was back to her old self again.

After waking up from her coma, she was shocked to hear that a whole week had passed since the shooting. It had only seemed like it had happened yesterday. Of course, when you're in a coma you aren't aware of the passing of time, something that didn't make her feel any more comfortable about what had happened to her. Though, you could never be comfortable with getting shot, so she supposed it had made it harder on her. She had lost a week of her life that she would never get back.

She sighed slightly. She knew she should be thankful that it had only been a week and not longer. If worse had come to worse, she could have not woken up at all. The thought that she could have died made her choke up a little. She wasn't ready to leave this life yet, and she was just thankful that she was getting another chance at it. She was going to try and make the best of it, starting with Fin.

They had admitted their feelings to one another, their love being openly declared. Now, it was just a matter of making their relationship work and last, something that she had no doubt would happen.

She loved Fin with all her heart and he loved her with his. They were a match made in Heaven.

She smiled.

Heaven!

A place she was certain that she wouldn't be going to for a little while longer.

Because her new journey through life had just begun, and she was doing it with the man she loved, with Fin, by her side!

The End.

**Author's Note: So, what did you think? Was it any good? So, that concludes this short story. I hope you guys enjoyed reading it, just as much as I enjoyed writing it. I think the way I ended this was just right, to be honest. Sweet, simple, and hopefully perfect. *_***

**Review please. *_* xxx**


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